When attacked by a Python...
 

I got this tip yesterday from a young lad on Lantau Island (part of Hong Kong).
There are some very large pythons on the island and he'd encountered a 13ft'er.

He remembered his Grandma's advice. Offer the python your leg...either one, whichever is your least favourite I suppose. The python will try to swallow it, but when it comes to the groin it has to stop as it can't get the other leg in.

This will eventually cause it to choke and release you.

Now, I guess this wouldn't work with animals that can chew, so sharks and lions may just thank you kindly and keep munching up your torso, but as for a python, this guy swears it worked for him.
PS, he did have both legs.

I was advised to firmly stroke them where their head meets the neck with a K-Bar.

A type of knife.

Pythons have to eat somehow/someone
 

I have also heard this old chestnut a few years ago - I think it had a few cartoons doing the rounds with it at the time.
Seems to me though that the big snake won't be all that interested in an offering of a leg when it is sqeezing the very breath out of you; assuming that it succeeds in suffocating you, it would then proceed to swallow you head first 'cos that is what they do best. :rolleyes2:

There was another pic doing the rounds on the WWW of just such a big snake which was cut open to show a guy inside it's belly - very impressive - anyone got a copy still?

how fast?
 

How fast can a 13 ft plus python travel?
I understand that they often drop coils from their resting/ambush place in tree branches, or attack from waters edge, but over land can they out slither a running person?
If they can, I'll need to find a slower friend.

"They taste like chicken", said Billy the boa....

moved on.
 

Left HK and now in Hainan the southern most province of China. We pick up our bike tomorrow so spent the day in 92% humity sweating like crazy. The advice here isn't about pythons, but they do have Nepalese Bears, a large-ish cat and water buffalo. The later look benign as they munch roadside grass, but they are untethered and prone to meandering. Keep an eye open for them, as although they have horns, they don't have lights.

There are also kissing fish. We have a spa where these little suckers gather round and eat the dead cells off your body. So if you have anything like psoriasis or even bad dandruff, give them a miss, as you could be eaten alive.

would have to agree that offering a Python a leg wont help if it is planning to eat you as it will just kill you first - constrictors all operate by killing their prey then trying to eat it, otherwise they would be at severe risk of an internal wound whilst chowing down. Even venomous snakes wait for the venom to kick in before they even start dislocating thier jaw.

If you are unlucky enough to have a big constrictor decide you are on the menu I would recommend you try and kill it, as much force as you can on the neck behind the head (try and use some sort of weapon). If it gets you wrapped up try not to breathe out too much and hope that someone saves you. It is much more likely that a big snake will try and bite you as a defence mechanism - although there is no venom the salmonella etc in their saliva could kill, so rinse the wound out immediately with the strongest booze you've got. Or medicinal alcohol.

Still, overall risk of any sort of snake attack is very low as long as you make enough vibrations. If you think there might be things lurking just walk heavily!

They are a bit like chicken, so don't waste it after you've wasted it!!

The perfect weapon against any and all threats: Vogon poetry, which is known to be lethal...

vogon poetry
 

INDU you wrote "The perfect weapon against any and all threats: Vogon poetry, which is known to be lethal..."

__________________
the only problem is.....those that have heard it....are dead.:(
so getting hold of it is a little bit like getting hold of the perfect bike.....impossible.
(im not wrong, there is no such thing as a "perfect" bike, EVERY bike I have ever seen has been modified in some way by the owner, henceforth it was never perfect in the first place.:innocent:

precautionary horn
 

When in Sanya, use your horn before you make any under or overtaking manouever. Us eyour horn as you make the manouever, and then use it to thank the gods that you weren't killed while making the manouever:that's assuming you weren't, which is a big assumption.

The traffic is abstract, frenetic, free flowing and free form and absolutely exhilerating after riding the sterile US states. It's an adrenilin rush in town and sensory overload once in the countryside.

Sanya, Hainan Island-riding up into the mountains and the remote villages...highly recommend it.
Pick up your bike from Gary Conway at the Rainbow Bar. It's where all the expat flotsum and jetsom wash up.

I'll add an email address and tel # soon.

Never thought of that... Well. I'll have to rely on the old towel then.

loose nut
 

I've no doubt that the death trap we are riding on has it's share of seized and loose nuts, but today's adventure came courtesy of a ride in the mangrove area of Hainan. Ruddy great breeze blew up from the sea and down they came, coconuts!
Not the little brown things we are used to at the fairground in the UK, great big green things the size of footballs. Bouncing down and across the road.
One minute we were riding a corridor of canopy covered shadows, the next we were running the gauntlet and very glad to be wearing our helmets even in 90% humidity.
Can coconuts understand zogon poetry, when it's mimed?

Never underestimate a coconut! You might try to mime Vogon poetry, but I believe you have to do it while in free fall alongside the coconut. The way to achieve this is by throwing yourself off a cliff, then miss the ground completely. I'm not sure if this works when throwing yourself off a coconut palm, though. Might be worth a try.

Just remember "Don't Panic!" :eek3:

Best thing!
 

Some good advice I heared was to lie flat on your back, raise your legs until your feet are as close to your ears as possible and then kiss your ass goodby!!
Oh! t works for bears as well! Not so good with sharks though!
Orrin

:rofl: Probably the soundest advice thus far!

pythons & coconuts
 

:rofl:
you may find
python, monitor lizards, civet cats(in my ceilings) &
coconuts at my backyard!
but I never worry about them, I only worry about the cobras :nono:
bummped into them several time, and also a King Cobra in our weekend jungle trek! not nice...

yeah, python usually suffocate its prey first before choosing which legs!
they like to swallow, they prefer head first!
One thing good though, if youre unluckny enough to be swallowed by a python, you wont go missing cause after devouring they fall asleep with a distorted bodyline depanding on what they just had.
Few years back a woman were found dead while the python was still trying to swallow her torso. Same thing with one poor rubber tapper!
Could still remember looking a picture in the newspaper in the 70's, a python was caught after eating more the TEN goats in farm! It just lie there helplessly, it couldnt even move an inch!
& if you do a Round Island Ride in Penang be carefull during the fruit season coz "Durian" fall the sky too!! As a safety precaution, orchard owners sprung net above the streets. just like Trapeeze:D

The python does not win every time (just nearly every time!):-

BBC NEWS | Asia-Pacific | HK woman grapples pet from python

Death by Fish
 

Sanya have something worse than sharks, pythons and cobras...kissing fish!

The idea is you sit in a spa and they come up and nibble the dead cells from your skin.

Let me tell you it's excrutiating...they tickle like you'd not believe. Some how they get between your toes and that certain soft spot on the sole of your feet. It's hysterical and your chuckle muscles are set into spasm until you explode with laughter and chucklnicity. It's absolute torture. 30 minutes spa time was reduced to no more than two minutes fully immersed and the rest of the time sat on the side of the spa, with maybe a toe at a time within nibble range.

There are so many of the little buggers, that even if you squash one as you get in the spa (sorry about that), there are still so many that they'll get you.

So in keeping with the cautionary nature of this forum, wear speedos, rather than looser short style swimwear, otherwise you might just become a kissing fish addict.

I think maybe the idea of offering a python a leg is that it will coil around one, leaving the other one free to kick about, or hop to any nearby python removal centre. If it's got you fully constricted and is in the process of swallowing you, I fear it may be too late.

Cobras
 

I know a guy who used to milk Cobras for a living. I asked him "How do you milk a Cobra?". He said "Well first off, you need a very small stool".

Interesting critters...

Candirú - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

To be sure
 

that these buggers don't eat you is simple..........give it some popcorn and suggest the two of you snuggle up and watch the 2007 Labour Party Conference on your portable DVD Player. It'll be fast asleep by the time Tony Blair gets to the stage, after which you can slip off nice and easy and the snake won't have noticed a thing. But do the decent thing and leave the popcorn!!

Chris :D

very amusing
 

:rofl:

:Beach:

It's always the little ones that "get up your nose". :rolleyes2:

picture protection.
 

It's why I carry a picture of Gordon Brown and Patricia Beckett. If Gordon Brown ("texture like sun") doesn't comatose them, Pat's pick will scare the bejeezus out of them!
Bless 'em, they have to enter politics when they look like that don't they.

cool pic!
 

Guys!
Ive got this really great email picture of a python caught on an electric fence somewhere in down under! but the thing is Ive got problem uploading it!:confused1:
its in bmp & the command says "error uploading":helpsmilie:

could someone assist me:(