Would appreciate advice from the older, wilder but wiser ones
 

I'm gonna put this out there... It's probably going to be long. If people care to read it, it might draw comments that I don't like or agree with but these things have been bubbling around in my mind for ages and I feel like the people in here might be able to offer some wisdom. Here it goes...

I think I've always had a bit of inner turmoil. I'm about to turn 38 and when I look at my adult years there is a common theme of moving around and travel. When I recount the places I've lived and been, people are usually impressed, some amazed or envious... But if I'm honest, some times I suspect it was all just a process of trying to escape myself. It is always the same cycle: become bored with my life, start daydreaming about some new place/adventure, plan and save, move/travel, be happy for a while, repeat.

I'm not sure if this is a common trait of many travellers and adventurers or a flaw in my person haha.

Adventure riding just upped the ante... 3 years ago I set out from Calgary on what was to become a year long, 38,000 km ride to Panama, then to Newfoundland, back down to Utah and back to Calgary. The following year was a nice 5 weeker down to Baja and back via the coast with my best bud, followed by some good 4-5 day trips around my current area of Fernie, BC more recently.

The thing is, adventure riding feels different... I absolutely love it.

But you know what else is good? Living in Fernie in a cool little house surrounded by nature, all the stuff I like to do, and being comfortable. I have the opportunity to purchase my house (which is my favourite place, I have lived) in the spring.

But you know what else would be good? Starting where I left off in Panama or Colombia and adv riding South America for a year! I find myself thinking about it constantly, watching adv vids on YouTube, checking the travel bikes for sale on HU...

But shouldn't I be saving more for retirement (I do have some)? Looking for a wife? Contributing to society in some meaningful way? I don't have some big inheritance coming my way, it's always been up to me. And although my job is great for saving good sums of money in short periods of time, I'm not sure how many years I could do it for as it involves spending most of my life away from home.

I guess I'm looking for some advice from the older, wiser members who have been through it. The people who have done the big trips and wrestled with this stuff themselves. You don't meet too many in day to day life.https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/201...2194937b9a.jpghttps://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/201...0e108dfb69.jpg

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Firstly, welcome to the HUBB:welcome:

I'm only a little older than you (41), and have come across some similarities in my life. Not so much the 'travel long distances at once' bug, but the 'I should be "x" now, shouldn't I?'. The thing I've realised as I get older is that there's no such thing as 'should' in our lives. Each of us are individuals and we must do what's right for us. I don't have kids, many of my friends do. 'Shouldn't' I want the same? Well, that's not for me and I know that.

Personally, I do worry about getting old and having no money. Going through Uni and being skint wasn't great at all, and I don't personally want to do that when I'm old. So I travel a lot, but I'm doing it in stages. There might be some places I'll have to put off until I retire due to work commitments ( I REALLY want to ride in Mongolia, but it's quite some distance from the UK in one trip!) but I do a fair bit of travel every year.

One way to look at your situation is that it sounds like you really want to keep travelling. You're only thinking about settling down because it's what you 'should' do. Take out the 'should'; what do you want to do?

I think what I'm trying to say is what's the ultimate motivation for your travelling? What do you want from life long term? Forget what you 'should' be doing and consider what YOU'D like to do. What's best for you?

Ps, the House looks amazing,

What do you want to "have?"
 

landsburrito,

You have a well honed style of writing, I suspect this is only one of your many and varied talents/abilities. In a concise diatribe you were able to accurately express the concerns of many who read here. Are you a professional writer?

On to your multi faceted question.
First, Endurodude sort of nails it. Life is short, let's not waste today and hope for a better tomorrow, I think is what he suggests. The old carpe diem Latin for seize the day, trusting as little as possible to the future.

Now, extremes are just that , extreme! You sound way to together to abandon some form of financial security for the future and as I think you are Canadian, have health care in tact. So, you are not off track by hoarding/investing money and learning skills appropriate for the winter of your years.

I am 70 years old, and here is what, with the help of others, I have figured out.

Asking "who do you want to be?" and "what do you want to do in life?" are the wrong questions that are generally foremost in the minds of counselors, parents and loved ones.

The RIGHT question is 'what do you want to have in life?" Do you want to have a healthier environment, less hunger in the world, less warfare, do you want to amass a fortune IMHO having money or stuff for its' own sake is not a viable "have." Do you want to have a mate?, do you want to have children? Do you want to have a healthier body and mind? Do you want to have the personal knowledge of many lands and peoples? Do you want to make/have friends allover the world?
The list of "haves" is as long as your imagination. You see the who to be and the what to do are contingent upon what you want to have! So, the right question is what do you want to have? Then you will know who you have to be and what you do to have what you want.

The key is to figure out what you want to have in life. Above are only a few examples. You might want to have a published novel, or have (create) a travel documentary - both of these and some other "haves" are really acts of giving or sharing with others.

So, this is as far as I go along your path. I have only given you some interesting scenery to look at.
And remember....as has been quoted here before " Not all who wander are lost"

One last bit of advice - deciding it is not time to decide is just as valuable a decision as any other.

Eat, Drink, and write everyday
xfiltrate

landsburrito,

I had a great reply written for you only to be completely humbled by the wisdom shared by xfiltrate. I recommend you start there!

Thank you xfiltrate, I will put your advice to good use myself!

IMO we all have different goals and needs in life. We also never know where we will end up. When I was younger I thought I would get old(age), but not OLD(attitude). There was an Harley ad several decades ago that showed a geezer telling his grandkids about the excitement of riding down the road, wind in his hair, etc. Did you do that grandpa? No, I bought aluminum siding instead.:( If I hadn't gone on my first big trip I would have probably have put a down on a house my mom thought I should buy-not a bad idea- and never left the area, never met my wife, never had the kids and adventures I did. Worked for me, I was lucky, no assurances it will work for others. I am now 70 and try to avoid saying everyone should do things one way, especially my way.

a middle ground?
 

Can't top xfiltrate's post. But just a thought - when I was much younger, I kind of asked the 'what do you want to have in life?' question, but came up with what seemed like contradictory answers - adventure, but also some financial stability. Our solution was to become permanent expats, picking a location and then travelling the surrounding countries, then moving on to the next location. It's not the same as true long-trip adventure travel, but it allows a chance to learn a variety of cultures in a bit more depth. We've been abroad 25 years by this point, and on continent #4 ...

In my 29, I was exactly at the same stage. What I want from my life for the long term.

I had everything. Excellent job & career prospects, a super beautiful house inherited (NO mortgage!!!), a beautiful partner, a company car & my car, my stunning red Vespa for long or short rides and a little city to live plus short trips-escapes all around the world (Moscow, Stockholm, Cairo, Istanbul, Rome, Zurich are a few destinations only).

I am now 34 and the last 5 years I am traveliving non-stop around the world. Since 2012, along with my partner, we have explored Africa, North & Central America and we are currently in Colombia. Our visa expires 1st of July so we "must" move to Ecuador. We are on a campervan but at this point, I dont think it does really matter.

Visas, local regulations & weather patterns are the only restrictions so far and our longest term plan starts & ends in the country we are.

True, authentic long-term travelling with a super tight budget. No vanlife bullshit, no wifi chasing, no likes, tags & followers lovers!

We stopped following the news, we have no social media accounts, we do not do any marketing of our trip on FB or instagram (other than a book that we have published), we do not save any money but only recycle in the best possible way the rent we get from our flat, we work or volunteer locally, we always look for connections with local communities and after all, we enjoy what we are up to.

My biggest question before quitting everything back home was NOT if I will enjoy this adventure. We all know that we will.

My biggest fear was if this sort of exchange (travel+freedom vs all benefits of an anchored life) will be fair and worthwhile for the long term.

I am not older than you or even wiser but I can confirm that this exchange works perfect so far.

At your disposal for any further communication. I am super happy to share all my fears, doubts and answers that I gave to myself.


Cheers

Nikos

Life has too many twists and turns, you can't put down ideas about what you are going to do at a certain age. A restless mind is an intelligent mind, always searching for that new thing to satisfy the curiosity. I learned too late in life that if you have an idea or an itch to do something, you need to just get on and do it. Life has this habit of turning round and biting you, and it's only when you realise that your life might end sooner than you hope that you start having regrets about the things you haven't done. In my case cancer 15 years ago, only saved by a transplant. In the 3 weeks between diagnosis and surgery my whole outlook on life changed. It could happen to you. Don't follow what everyone else does ( remember, only dead fish go with the flow), or what others expect you to do. Your semi guilty conscience about doing things outside what is perceived as the norm is a potential trap which will deprive you of your free mind. Only do things because you want to, not because you feel you have to.

Everyday I wake up is a bonus, I just get on with the day. Life is biting me again, I've had to give up the bike after 45 years. At 66 I don't mind really, it's not the end of the world, I'm just going to get on with something else, and as Tolkein has often been quoted here:- '' all we have to do is to decide what to do with the time that is given to us''.

Little song for you:- appropriate. www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaQnYSbgnM0