THIS IS A TRUE STORY.

The events depicted in this report took place in England, France, Spain and Andorra in June 2014.

At the request of the innocent, some of the names have been changed.

With a complete lack of respect for the three Muppets involved, the rest has been told roughly as it occurred.

(Whilst every effort has been made to produce an accurate report some of the events may have taken place in a different order than portrayed. All views / opinions are my own and do not necessarily represent those of the other parties involved)

Bikes -DRZ 400s, XR 650r, KTM 690 Enduro R

Saturday 14th

Loaded up all my sh*t and set off towards Glenn's.

Oh God, what a horribly nasty thing to ride all loaded up. Cornering was interesting or scary, depending on your outlook, with the bike dropping into corners as if the wheels had been pulled out from underneath it. I slowly got the hang of it as I made my way along the A31 but it wasn't a lot of fun. Was I really going to ride this thing a few thousand miles ?

I arrived at Glenn's and we went through a few things. We had a meal and a couple of b e e r s (sic) before I crashed in his spare room.

Aldershot to Chandlers Ford - 45 miles


Sunday 15th

Lee arrived at 06:30. Bloody hell ! He wasn't joking when he said he had loaded up all but the kitchen sink. James came out to see us of and we wobbled away towards Portsmouth.

At the Docs, Glenn commented that his bike had a nasty wobble at speed and planned to do a reload to distribute the weight better or perhaps even dump some stuff. We checked in and showed our passports although Glenn didn't really need his because the girl at the check-in kiosk knew him.

We bumped into three blokes who were doing a road tour of France. I knew they'd be on the boat because I'd seen the trip being organised on The Hubb. As is usual with these kind of things, when the trip was at the early stages of planning they'd had loads of interest but most riders had dropped out.

We were pulled aside for a security check, the chap had a look in Glenn and Lee's luggage and my rucksack was x-rayed while I passed through a metal detector.

With the bikes strapped down on the boat, we headed upstairs to find our pre-booked seats then get some munchies. The crossing was smooth and uneventful.

We disembarked and went through customs then hit the road. Our first night's stop was just South of Chateau-Gontier in the Pays de la Loire. Google maps gives the distance as 127 miles but our meandering route was 146. We set up our tents in a rather nice campsite near a river. As is often the case with the campsites in France, the pitches were demarqued by hedges giving the feel of your own little spot.

We cooked up some chilli con carne and rice then went for a wander about. There was a pizza restaurant with a bar just along the road from the site entrance so we could have saved our chilli and had a pizza with our couple of ales. It was Leffe Blonde I think. There is something weird about the Belgian Abbey ales; they slip down easily and although not overly strong, they do give me a buzz quite quickly.

We all made the mistake of not putting on some insect repellant and the mozzies had a good meal at our expense.

Chandlers Ford to Daon – 146 miles

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