Most people uses Dogubeyazit because people usually get their VISA for Iran from Iran Consulate in Erzurum and it is the main border gate between Iran & Turkey.
You could take southern route (hotter) and then decide whether heading up to the north or try to cross the border from Kapikoy.
As for the road conditions, winter at the east of Turkey is harsh so there is icing, snow etc. though main roads usually are ok (if it is not snowing) and temperatures are subzero most of the time. (Erzurum is colder than Van, around -5 to -10 C daytime and around -25 nighttime)
Cheers,
Ozgur
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