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20 Jan 2017
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Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: GOC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xfiltrate
Sure Chris, the post you referenced is all about hope. Hope that it is possible to work hard, save money and tour the world by motorcyle. And one more thing, it is possible to understand that the powerful, the controllers, do not always get it right, that the common man can observe reality and understand it, see it clearly, without the bias of the bought and paid for media. And, once and a while describe it to others.
thanks for asking. xfiltrate
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Thanks for that. I agree with everything you say in these 6 lines.
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20 Jan 2017
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chris you are a stalker. This makes you unpredictably dangerous. 
Karl65 you are being stalked.
Be careful, you do not know the capabilities of people who do these things. It starts out as innocent fun for them but has the potential for so many negative meanderings. Some day you might come home and find him sleeping in your bed, with a hairstyle just like yours, wearing your clothes and passing himself off as 'Karl'. Please keep your bank account details very secure and don't talk to strangers until 'dangerous chris' has been captured and is receiving the appropriate physchological treatment.
He does not care about you.......read my stuff instead! 
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20 Jan 2017
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Oxford UK
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *Touring Ted*
Karl65..
Don't listen to them mate.
Follow me instead. Send me your address and I'll send you a signed postcard.
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A signed postcard ehh. That's raised the stakes. I feel like I've just turned up at a gunfight and only brought my swiss army knife. 
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20 Jan 2017
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChrisFS
chris you are a stalker. This makes you unpredictably dangerous.
Karl65 you are being stalked.
Be careful, you do not know the capabilities of people who do these things. It starts out as innocent fun for them but has the potential for so many negative meanderings. Some day you might come home and find him sleeping in your bed, with a hairstyle just like yours, wearing your clothes and passing himself off as 'Karl'. Please keep your bank account details very secure and don't talk to strangers until 'dangerous chris' has been captured and is receiving the appropriate physchological treatment.
He does not care about you.......read my stuff instead! |
You're a right one, bringing up stalking and all. You're using my name!
In the picture you paint, I'm in Karl's bed. At this point, where is his wife? When I'm in his kitchen, have I eaten all his cookies? 
This is all getting very weird now. I'm not the only one needing treatment   
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20 Jan 2017
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chris
You're a right one, bringing up stalking and all. You're using my name!
In the picture you paint, I'm in Karl's bed. At this point, where is his wife? When I'm in his kitchen, have I eaten all his cookies?
This is all getting very weird now. I'm not the only one needing treatment |
He may not have a wife. If he does and she was in the bed too then you're more dangerous than I thought.
There are no cookies left....I ate them when I was there before you 
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22 Jan 2017
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Location: Wirral, England.
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Just to confirm...
With every signed postcard comes a free sample my: 'Touring Ted's once in a lifetime offer; BMW branded Adventure lozenges'
In reality they are just re-braded Viagra and are designed especially to help the older, more conservative BMW rider 'Self relieve' himself whilst admiring their new GS from their tent porch.
Chris will testify to their effectiveness I'm sure.
He took one at the last Horizons meeting and was 'up' all night.
So the rumour has it.
__________________
Did some trips.
Rode some bikes.
Fix them for a living.
Can't say anymore.
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22 Jan 2017
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Buenos Aires, Argentina
Posts: 960
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *Touring Ted*
Just to confirm...
With every signed postcard comes a free sample my: 'Touring Ted's once in a lifetime offer; BMW branded Adventure lozenges'
In reality they are just re-braded Viagra and are designed especially to help the older, more conservative BMW rider 'Self relieve' himself whilst admiring their new GS from their tent porch.
Chris will testify to their effectiveness I'm sure.
He took one at the last Horizons meeting and was 'up' all night.
So the rumour has it.
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TT, as usual your timing is impeccable. I just read your promo for "Touring Ted's once in a lifetime offer; BMW branded Adventure lozenges'
We are now offering Viagra Tours to Buenos Aires. Our cliental are mostly way.... on the north side of fifty, except the women who seem to be younger. Your "BMW branded Adventure lozenges" might be just what our cliental needs. Do you offer a similar product for women?
Do you wholesale your product(s)? Our Viagra Tours have become so popular we are now chartering jets. The Canadians are our best clients. Many of them have been legally visiting Cuba for years, and in general know the score. North Americans from Nevada get it quicker.
Ted, Perhaps we could create a joint venture?
Eat, Drink and try TT's BMW branded adventure lozenges
xfiltrate
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22 Jan 2017
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Karl, do not accept drugs from strangers.
They do not care about you.
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22 Jan 2017
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Contributing Member
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Wirral, England.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xfiltrate
TT, as usual your timing is impeccable. I just read your promo for "Touring Ted's once in a lifetime offer; BMW branded Adventure lozenges'
We are now offering Viagra Tours to Buenos Aires. Our cliental are mostly way.... on the north side of fifty, except the women who seem to be younger. Your "BMW branded Adventure lozenges" might be just what our cliental needs. Do you offer a similar product for women?
Do you wholesale your product(s)? Our Viagra Tours have become so popular we are now chartering jets. The Canadians are our best clients. Many of them have been legally visiting Cuba for years, and in general know the score. North Americans from Nevada get it quicker.
Ted, Perhaps we could create a joint venture?
Eat, Drink and try TT's BMW branded adventure lozenges
xfiltrate
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With your place becoming the new travellers lonely hearts meeting meeting place it's only savy that Adventure Lozenges are available.
More 'bang' for you buck.
__________________
Did some trips.
Rode some bikes.
Fix them for a living.
Can't say anymore.
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22 Jan 2017
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HUBB Advertiser
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Buenos Aires, Argentina
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Support for the Members
Quote:
Originally Posted by *Touring Ted*
With your place becoming the new travellers lonely hearts meeting meeting place it's only savy that Adventure Lozenges are available.
More 'bang' for you buck.
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Touring Ted, thanks for mentioning the ranch, as the French would say it is a zone de transit.
From what I have seen so far our clientel pays "more bucks for a bang." Nevertheless we hope and pray for meaningful relationships that give comfort in a cold hard world. The need for evasive love winding it's way through the hearts of each Hubber , sometimes rides the low road.
The check is in the mail, drop ship 144 cases of adventure loszenges to our ranch on Route 66.
Mil gracias Ted, you are supporting every member. In other words, you are supporting our members. Keep up the good work.
xfiltrate
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22 Jan 2017
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Ted, a wee word in your ear on the quiet.............
I had an accident when manufacturing those BMW branded Adventure lozenges for you. They are not viagra, they are rohipnol. Please be careful who you sell them to and please make sure they are aware of the differences between the two. 
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30 Jan 2017
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Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: GOC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *Touring Ted*
Just to confirm...
With every signed postcard comes a free sample my: 'Touring Ted's once in a lifetime offer; BMW branded Adventure lozenges'
In reality they are just re-braded Viagra and are designed especially to help the older, more conservative BMW rider 'Self relieve' himself whilst admiring their new GS from their tent porch.
Chris will testify to their effectiveness I'm sure.
He took one at the last Horizons meeting and was 'up' all night.
So the rumour has it.
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Apologies for the late response to the most recent witty replies. Been incommunicado after one of Ted's lozenges (or possibly Mr FS's mutant version?  ). Yes an entire week! Wow.
Here's a pic of the "Down" after the "Up" that Ted describes.
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30 Jan 2017
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Wirral, England.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChrisFS
Ted, a wee word in your ear on the quiet.............
I had an accident when manufacturing those BMW branded Adventure lozenges for you. They are not viagra, they are rohipnol. Please be careful who you sell them to and please make sure they are aware of the differences between the two. |
It's luck of the draw mate... 
__________________
Did some trips.
Rode some bikes.
Fix them for a living.
Can't say anymore.
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11 Feb 2017
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......
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11 Apr 2017
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Warming up an old thread... 
Also topical in line with the celebration of Brian of Nazareth's Resurrection coming up on Sunday ?
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Check the RAW segments; Grant, your HU host is on every month!
Episodes below to listen to while you, err, pretend to do something or other...
2020 Edition of Chris Scott's Adventure Motorcycling Handbook.
"Ultimate global guide for red-blooded bikers planning overseas exploration. Covers choice & preparation of best bike, shipping overseas, baggage design, riding techniques, travel health, visas, documentation, safety and useful addresses." Recommended. (Grant)
Led by special operations veterans, Stanford Medicine affiliated physicians, paramedics and other travel experts, Ripcord is perfect for adventure seekers, climbers, skiers, sports enthusiasts, hunters, international travelers, humanitarian efforts, expeditions and more.
Ripcord Rescue Travel Insurance™ combines into a single integrated program the best evacuation and rescue with the premier travel insurance coverages designed for adventurers and travel is covered on motorcycles of all sizes.
(ONLY US RESIDENTS and currently has a limit of 60 days.)
Ripcord Evacuation Insurance is available for ALL nationalities.
What others say about HU...
"This site is the BIBLE for international bike travelers." Greg, Australia
"Thank you! The web site, The travels, The insight, The inspiration, Everything, just thanks." Colin, UK
"My friend and I are planning a trip from Singapore to England... We found (the HU) site invaluable as an aid to planning and have based a lot of our purchases (bikes, riding gear, etc.) on what we have learned from this site." Phil, Australia
"I for one always had an adventurous spirit, but you and Susan lit the fire for my trip and I'll be forever grateful for what you two do to inspire others to just do it." Brent, USA
"Your website is a mecca of valuable information and the (video) series is informative, entertaining, and inspiring!" Jennifer, Canada
"Your worldwide organisation and events are the Go To places to for all serious touring and aspiring touring bikers." Trevor, South Africa
"This is the answer to all my questions." Haydn, Australia
"Keep going the excellent work you are doing for Horizons Unlimited - I love it!" Thomas, Germany
Lots more comments here!
Every book a diary
Every chapter a day
Every day a journey
Refreshingly honest and compelling tales: the hights and lows of a life on the road. Solo, unsupported, budget journeys of discovery.
Authentic, engaging and evocative travel memoirs, overland, around the world and through life.
All 8 books available from the author or as eBooks and audio books
Back Road Map Books and Backroad GPS Maps for all of Canada - a must have!
New to Horizons Unlimited?
New to motorcycle travelling? New to the HU site? Confused? Too many options? It's really very simple - just 4 easy steps!
Horizons Unlimited was founded in 1997 by Grant and Susan Johnson following their journey around the world on a BMW R80G/S.
Read more about Grant & Susan's story
Membership - help keep us going!
Horizons Unlimited is not a big multi-national company, just two people who love motorcycle travel and have grown what started as a hobby in 1997 into a full time job (usually 8-10 hours per day and 7 days a week) and a labour of love. To keep it going and a roof over our heads, we run events all over the world with the help of volunteers; we sell inspirational and informative DVDs; we have a few selected advertisers; and we make a small amount from memberships.
You don't have to be a Member to come to an HU meeting, access the website, or ask questions on the HUBB. What you get for your membership contribution is our sincere gratitude, good karma and knowing that you're helping to keep the motorcycle travel dream alive. Contributing Members and Gold Members do get additional features on the HUBB. Here's a list of all the Member benefits on the HUBB.
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helps answer the question - Why Go? Inspirational stories by veteran travellers Greg Frazier (5 times RTW), Peter and Kay Forwood (193 countries), Tiffany Coates (Mongolia Mayhem) and Rene Cormier (University of Gravel Roads).
Get Ready! covers planning, paperwork, medical and many other topics! "Inspirational and Awesome!" See the trailer here!
What stuff do I need - riding gear, clothing, camping gear, first aid kit, tires, maps and GPS? What don't I need? How do I pack it all in? Lots of opinions from over 150 travellers!
break down language barriers, overcome culture shock, ship the bike and deal with breakdowns and emergencies."Just makes me want to pack up and go!" See the trailer here!
Grant demystifies the black art of Tire Changing and Repair to help you STAY on the road! "Very informative and practical." See the trailer here!
Ladies on the Loose! For the first time ever, a motorcycle travel DVD made for women, by women! These intrepid women share their tips to help you plan your own motorcycle adventure. They also answer the women-only questions, and entertain you with amazing tales from the road! Presented by Lois Pryce, veteran solo traveller through South America and Africa and author of 'Lois on the Loose', and 'Red Tape and White Knuckles.'
Cotton or synth sweat-wicking t-shirts with the cool Horizons Unlimited graphic on the front and a snappy slogan (changing every year) on the back.
Show your route on your panniers. Great conversation starter when you meet people on the road!
Motorcycle and travel books to inspire and inform you!
The definitive guide to planning your motorcycle adventure! This insanely ambitious 2-year project has produced an informative and entertaining 5-part, 18 hour video series. "The ultimate round the world rider's how-to!" MCN UK.
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