Several years ago, beginning in Spain, en route through the Balkans and Greece to Turkey, rosa del desierto - a Spaniard - and me - USA, on two BMW G650-GS were stopped at the "border" of Italy and Slovenia. On the Italian side I noted a big van with a satellite dish protruding from its' roof. Thinking all border posts had vanished with the emergence of the EU, we were suspicious when we were stopped at the Slovenia border crossing by "foreigners" wearing crisp, pressed uniforms with all kinds of insignia and metals.

"Pass-sa-porté Please" was the command, in Italian, and when I responded "What" he said in very heavily Italian accented English "Pass-sa-porté" As I unzipped my jacket to retrieve my Pass-sa-Porte, the border guard tried to grab it. He latched onto it, but I did not let go. So there began a struggle - I looked over to rosa del desierto who was pointing at a big camera in the border station with film crew, so I went into ridiculous mode by twisting my hands - still clinging to the pass-sa-porté up and over - unbalancing the border guard who still had a hold on my pass-sa-porté and with a judo move eased him to the ground.

I quickly dismounted and helped him up with sincere "escuzi, escuzi" (excuse me) when he again went for my pass-sa-porté and as I raised it up above my head, he began jumping for it. I backed away, with the guard in chase, when another bigger "guard" came out from the border station crying "stop" "stop" just as I was about to take down the guard for a second time, he started laughing.

By this time rosa del desierto had dismounted and figured out what was going on. We were being filmed by and Italian film crew for an Italian version of "Candid Camera" and the big man was trying to get us on our way as a car with a family were lining up behind us. the "director" had made the decision to dismiss us, as to dangerous and to much work and to go for the family.

We pulled over just passed the border and were asked to sign release forms
for "Candide Camera" TV show. Of course we refused explaining rosa del desierto was a famous Spanish actress and she would have to consult with her
agent.

I had never seen a border guard - and I have crossed many borders - wearing cleanly pressed uniforms with indeterminate insignia and metals, so be careful
crossing from Italia to Slovenia - you might just be caught on "Candid Camera" Italian style. The film crew had taken over an old , now defunct, border station for the purpose of creating funny Candid Camera style vignettes in Italian for Italian TV.

Eat, Drink and Smile. xfiltrate