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22 Jul 2007
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Leaving the better half behind...
Hey all,
Just wanted your experiences on travelling without the wife/girlfriend/etc? Does it work or does it lead to damage to a relationship? Are things inevetibly different when you return with a head full of tales while they have been stuck at home working?
Neil
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22 Jul 2007
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Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Netherlands
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Experience on travelling without the wife
In the summer, my wife can not get vacation from her work so every summer I go alone on a two to four week bike trip.
I rather have her with me but it is not possible yet and I won't stay at home.
Also, she is not nearly as much interested intraveling as I am anyway, so for us it works fine. Some people (like my parents) don't understand I travel without my wife, but that is their problem.
I do enjoy to travel alone because next to biking, my other passion is photography so I often stop to take pictures. Also with a very busy job and a very busy family (five children, one married, the others still living at home) and a very busy social life, it feels great to be alone with my bike on the road and not havng to worry about anything.
Having said that, I must admit that when I enjoy a beautiful view or a nice restaurant etc , I miss my wife because I would like to share it with her.
__________________
Jan Krijtenburg
My bikes are a Honda GoldWing GL1200 and a Harley-Davidson FXD Dyna Super Glide
My personal homepage with trip reports: https://www.krijtenburg.nl/
YouTube channel (that I do together with one of my sons): motormobilist.nl
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22 Jul 2007
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Spain
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When the cat·s away....
Hello my innocent friend....
Apart from that anything can happen in any moment,
Offcourse You are encouraging possible problems!
Or what do You think could happen if Your wife went off on a large trip, and all of the sudden your neighbours lovely daughter, not to mention your neighbour him/herself got all over You?
Cheers
Dan
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22 Jul 2007
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Beautiful views.....!!!!
Nudge, nudge know what I mean!!!!?
Wishing You and me all the best (I like traveling alone too)!
(Be carefull with too much) "love" and peace....
Dan
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23 Jul 2007
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I always want what I haven't got
When I travel with Mrs MarkE I sometimes wish I was alone if I just want to stop and enjoy the peace, or if I want to make a detour to see something that she might not think worth the extra miles, or if the road would be more fun riden solo, or if something goes wrong (if I must worry, I'd prefer to only have me to worry about). I also need a lot of my own space; with one wife and two daughters I need to get away from female company sometimes! I'm grateful for her understanding and trust when I do this, especially as she knows the circumstances of my divorce.
When I travel alone I seldom miss Mrs MarkE until I get back. I find it easier to say "do you remember seeing..." than "while I was away I saw...". A favourite part of a long term relationship is sitting by the fire on a cold winter's night reminiscing.
The best arrangement for us is to travel together if the shared experience is likely to be a big part of the trip, and solo if it's not (and yes, I do plan a few solo trips just to be alone). For the big trip we're planning (dreaming?), we will go together because there will be too many experiences, and we would be apart for too long. This will make it different to what it would be if I went alone, but we'll never know if it is better or worse because we'll have no comparrison.
Talk about what you want; if you want to be alone try to explain why, ask what she might want if you get to travel (bribery is a nasty word, but a very effective strategy); confront her fears (are you a womaniser, or just a pushover?). If you come back with "a head full of tales" you will be a different person, but is that better or worse than staying home with " a head full of bitterness and resentment"?
Last edited by MarkE; 23 Jul 2007 at 15:48.
Reason: I really should learn to spell!
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23 Jul 2007
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Lots of tail on the road. Leave her and have some fun.
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23 Jul 2007
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Join Date: Dec 2005
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Cant type what the wife said when i read out your question LOL
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25 Jul 2007
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Cheers for the replies guys. I should add that I am thinking RTW rather than a couple of weeks so it makes things all the more tricky. I've had The Dream now for several years and financially am coming to the point where its a real possibility.
Neil
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30 Jul 2007
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differnt point of view.
I have to travel a lot for work, and in two cases now these have been 6 month trips with little contact between us.(and one with easy communications). It was not fun and the last trip (3rd 6month separation in 2.5 years) was the worst and it took us the better part of a year to get back to where we were before. I love traveling and I love my wife, I find it less fun to do the 2-4 weeks with out her but it is possible and we do it all the time, the 6 "monthers" are just shite (remember this is for work). I have done several trips (for enjoyment only) with out her, and several with her, I always enjoy with her more...
We traveled the world for 5 months a few back together, and we were not the same people we were when we left. I found that we had much less in common with many of our friend when we got back.. travel it WILL change you.. so if one of the half says at home and does not change this could be enough to end that special bond you have.. But traveling together could make it that much stronger... Traveling in a pair is hard (maybe harder then solo).. as you are in each others faces all the time and this could get annoying.. so you will fight.. hell enjoy em.. I always though that if you dont care enough to fight then why bother...
bottom line i would not travel (for fun) for more then 3-4 weeks with out the MRS.X.
yeah i am a sap...
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31 Jul 2007
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gotta have someone at home to feed the dogs and bottle the homebrew
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31 Jul 2007
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Of course you miss your partner.
My wife has had to give up coming on the bike because of arthritis in her hips. Mind you she was never very keen but still put up with travelling.
My going away does not harm our relationship, probably makes it better. She knows I'm doing what I want to do and, as I say, the best part of any trip is drawing up outside the house.
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