There are quite a few webpages like this one:-

128 Ways To Dump Your Bike
and we have all tried a few of them!!

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Dave

It was one of those really sunny May days when there was this MC parade with close to a gazillion bikers riding through the city. I was aiding the organizers by being one of the road cross guards - you know, they dress you up in a fluorizing yellow coat and you may pass the parade and halt the oncoming traffic in the intersections to let the parade pass unhindered. Kind of a cool job if riding in a queue isn't your cup of tea. So after being cool zooming with my new BMW K1200GT past the parade several times, we finally came to our final destination, which is this local equivalent to the Ace Cafe. And with a gazillion bikers parked all around having a good time. I was brightening up the area with my yellow fluorizing jacket so I was easily spotted while I, in a cool Parade Guard manner, swung my legs over the GT, backed a bit and flipped the bike sideways in the most stunning fall you've ever seen. I have never to this day found what caused me to lose control like that. The audio version of the fall was the roaring sound of GT plastic, with its awesome resonance quality, hammering the asphalt while the entire crowd was looking. In silence. Needless to say, I felt very, very embarrassed. I straightened the bike, put the jacket into the pannier, and tried to pull off as invisible as possible, while hearing the laughter picking up.

I have already suggested to BMW to standard mount a rewind button on the K-GTs...

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HansP
All you wanted to know
about riding in Norway

I installed the alcohol resistant float kit on my R-100 GS Bing carbs. They have no overflow, so if the needle does not seat when you park it, gas leaks into the engine all night. Then when you go to start the bike, you can't because the pistons are "petro-locked"

This happened to me in Kazakstan. Naturally I removed the spark plugs and was about to crank the engine to expel the gas by having the pistons push it out. My riding mates told me that if you crank the engine without grounding the spark plug wires, you can damage the electrical system. So, having forgotten what spark plugs are for, I put the plugs back in the caps and layed them on the motor to ground them.

I cranked the engine, the half liter of gas shot out each side of the bike, the spark plugs sparked and my motorcycle burst into flames. Doh !

Pete,
That goes just a bit further than embarrassing! You must have walked home after that, half way RTW??!

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Dave

But i have a burning question...(pardon the pun) How far did the flames shoot?
hope you werent injured.

martyn

This may sound silly to some of you experienced rider out-there,
but to be frank, I,ve been riding for more than 20years but I still havent got the skill (balls) to do a real cool wheelie? I've dunnit a few times but its not so convincing or satisfyng at all! Plus I still couldnt overcome the scary feeling!

Any comment?

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Ride

Safe,

Sober,

& Save!

"man without beard is like porridge without salt": Ned Kelly

SORRY wrong posting

this is really embarassing

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Ride

Safe,

Sober,

& Save!

"man without beard is like porridge without salt": Ned Kelly

Hi, (Sorry again)
since I posted here, might as well join the fun!

couple of weeks ago:
just about to leave the driveway & entering the road, still in 1st gear. Suddenly my bike threw me sideways, only to discover a watermelon skin was the culprit...
last week:
after overtaking a car from the inside (to catch the green light) went straight into pothole! Bike went everywhere but manage to balance (felt like rodeo + I had my nephew with me) phew...
revv the bike again & took the left turn. Only to remember dust flew all over & me lying on my side, next to my bike! The car that I overtook passed by (probably laughing) I dint look, quickly help my nephew & pick my bike up! sands built up on the road after a heavy rainfall. This was at night & had poor bike lights & bald tyres!
few years back:
had'nt unlocked the steering-lock!

as usual overtaking queues in a bad jam, suddenly a passenger from a cab open the door behind the driver! I was going pretty slow but the my knees was hit directly by door edge!!! I could see stars!!

Luckily all the tall tale above was on my postie bike

__________________

Ride

Safe,

Sober,

& Save!

"man without beard is like porridge without salt": Ned Kelly

My girlfriend and I were riding two up on an R80GS this summer through Europe. We had found a great little spot to camp by a small mountain stream down this old dirt road in northern Italy. The following morning we woke up to an old man weed whacking some tall grass by our tent. We got out and talked to him in our very limited Italian we knew and had a nice conversation. He was still working after we had packed up the bike. My girlfriend had walked back down to the stream to fill up the water bottle and I proceeded to pull the bike down off the center stand. I wasn’t paying attention and somehow let the bike come down onto the end of my foot. I couldn’t manage to pull my foot out and I couldn’t roll it either way because I couldn’t angle my self to push it without losing balance and dropping the whole thing. With me struggling to get loose, my girlfriend off enjoying fresh mountain water the old worker watched and I can imagine thought I was a pretty smart guy. Finally I managed to get my foot out without crushing my toes even more and without giving the man any more shows.
Nathan

I once had a Honda C100, not a big bike by any stretch. A workmate had a Suzi 90 but it was in for a service so could I give him a lift?

We lived along the A40 west of London and the traffic at the lights was always backed up at least 500yds in every lane. No problem for us bikers, we just whipped down the space between the rows.

I did so and heard this funny knocking noise. It wasn't 'til I stopped and looked in my mirror that I saw all the car drivers leaning out and ajusting their wing mirrors. The pillock on the pillion had his elbows stuck out so far that he caught the car mirrors both left and right of us. I still grin about it when I shoot a queue.

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Happy Trails

Stagbeetle

It is not the Journey nor yet the Destination, that is the Prize; it is the people you meet on the way.

Blog on http://www.horizonsunlimited.com/tstories/fairless/

No, we managed to put it out. The flames were burning the fuel lines and once they got through, they would have access to about seven gallons of gas. We didn't have any water, but everyone hopped to it throwning dirt at the fire in the usual enthusiastic manner that people do things when they are about to get blown up.

So then the flames were out, but since we did this while the spark plugs were out, the engine was now full of dirt. I only had two days left on my visa, so top end rebuild was out of the question. What we did, ironically, was repeatedly fill the top end with gasoline and expel it by cranking the engine (but not leaving the spark plugs in the way) and hopefully expel the dirt too.

I rode it like that from Kakzakstan to Cape Town and across north America. That was three years ago and it's still going strong.

I can't compete with petefromberkely, but ~20 years ago I was riding my Suzuki GS1000G, and pulled up to a stop light and found out too late that my shoelace had blown over the shift lever. The bike was already leaning over to that side and there was no saving it, whacking my helmet on the car next to me as I went down. The Vetter fairing and bags (remember those?) kept the bike off my legs, and I escaped with only wounded pride and a few scratches on the bike.

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Andy Tiegs
https://new.horizonsunlimited.com/ts...lsouth-america

Fortunately this one happened to a friend! Coming back into London on a empty dual carriageway road about 2.00am he came to a set of traffic lights on red with the only car on the road stopped already.
Through tiredness he misjudged his braking and rolled slowly into the back of the car. No damage to either bike or car and after apologies the car driver went off down the road.
The next set of lights was about 1 mile further and also red so the car stopped. The bike rolled up behind and stopped this time. After a few seconds the clutch cable snapped (it was a British bike!) and he went into the back of the car again.
This time the car driver was not so understanding!

A while back I went for a ride after work and pulled up besides the Solent to phone the wife put helmet on Right handle bars to use the phone then decide after 10 minutes I would go back home to find I couldn’t start the bike as much as I turned it over with the starter motor whizzing quite happily. I could smell petrol so I presumed I’d flooded it so left it for 1/2 hour then tried again still wouldn’t work so called RAC to only end up arguing with the call operator saying she cant find Hamble on her map of locations. Eventually after finally getting though to her I was outside Hamble point marina even though she kept asking where it was (Put it in Google comes out first time?). I had already checked all the H/T leads and scratched my head several time so I decided to sit on the bike and wait for recovery. So put my helmet back on Right side handle bar to notice I had knocked the kill switch to off.

I felt really stupid so started the bike and left the area quietly after canceling RAC. So just goes to prove even blokes can have blonde moments…

1. - In the early 1980's I ran a Honda CX500 to work every day about 15 miles down the motorway (read here that it was well hot at the end of the ride). Had to stop at the gatehouse to the factory to clock in. One day I stupidly parked with my tyres on the weighbridge and the sidestand off it............lorry goes past, rocks the bike off the sidestand. Only problem was I tried to catch it, it fell on me and the red hot header pipe quickly burnt through the oversuit and started to do the same to me..............OUCH!

2. - Much more recently....KTM 950 Adventure......VERY heavily laden.......

Took it off the centre stand but left the sidestand down. Suspension drops a lot as the back tyre hits the ground, side stand hits my foot and then bike quickly falls away from me with me ontop of it, Have you tried picking up a fully fuelled, heavily laden (top box, panniers, tank bag, tent e.t.c) Adventure? Didn't help that it was a very hot day, me fully kitted up, helmet on and wife and child falling about laughing and unable to help.

These things do happen I suppose........

Roger.