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How does the relationship fare How does the relationship fare
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Travellers' questions that don't fit anywhere else This is an opportunity to ask any question, and post any notice you wish that doesn't fit into one of the other sections.
Photo by Hendi Kaf, in Cambodia

I haven't been everywhere...
but it's on my list!


Photo by Hendi Kaf,
in Cambodia



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  #1  
Old 1 Dec 2003
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How does the relationship fare
I've been wondering what difficulties couples travelling for extended periods together experience with their relationships,what the pitfalls are, and what advice you guys (and girls) can offer to help avoid them.
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  #2  
Old 1 Dec 2003
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Hi Murray, Still going on the Transalp?

I think it depends on the type of relationship you have.

My wife and I are best friends as well as beng married and never really argue (although there's the odd period of strained silence!).

We both share the same interests and are pretty easy going. Having said that we also like our own space, especially when travelling. If we spend more than a couple of days in one place we'll probably have a day when we do our own thing. Jules will go shopping and I'll do a bit of work on the bike or read on the beach, whatever.

If you have a 'Tempestuous' relationship then being together 24/7 would or could be an absolute nightmare.
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  #3  
Old 1 Dec 2003
usl usl is offline
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Hi ;

Its unavoidable to have strained moments. But if one of the sides can keep cool while the other one boiles up, then its great to have someone to share the memories.

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  #4  
Old 2 Dec 2003
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I'd go along with Bob. It does depend on the type of relationship you have. My better half (note reference for future assistance) and I do really well. One bonus it that I can concentrate on riding the bike while she navigates. It really helps to keep things from getting strained in the first place.

(Bob has to do everything - ride and navigate by GPS, compass, map, sun and wind direction all at the same time though!)

My biggest tip would be to admit when you're wrong. I'n never wrong of course but I'm sure it would be a help.

Chris

P.S. Is this going to become a thread for bikers to express their appreciation of their other half? Could be useful I suppose.
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  #5  
Old 2 Dec 2003
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It's all true,

My secret has been blown.

I do all the work and Jules falls asleep on the back. That way when it all goes wrong it really is all my fault!
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  #6  
Old 14 Dec 2003
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David and I are married, but that aside we have the perfect way of not getting on each others nerves on long haul trips. we both have our own motorcycle so when we do stop we are happy to talk to each other. And when were are not in the best mood with each other we dont have to speak as we are on our own anyhow.
Must work as we are preparing to go off again. Seems the 18 months last time did not cure us.
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  #7  
Old 19 Dec 2003
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My experience has been that a nice long motorcycle tour through another continent is actually quite good for the marriage - my wife is always happy to see me return home after 3 or 4 months away.
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  #8  
Old 21 Dec 2003
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Trent and i are on two bikes and have an autocom system - which is "Not a licence to yak" (or so he keeps telling me anyway!!)

The one rule we have is "Anything said in the heat of navigating doesn't count!!"

It does help to be friends though, and share responsibilities...

We're currently chilling out in France before heading back to NZ overland in Feb... So, after a couple of years on the road I may have something more to add!!

Jacqui
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  #9  
Old 22 Dec 2003
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Quote:
Originally posted by Jac:
We're currently chilling out in France

Jacqui
So are we! Whereabouts exactly are you? Unfortunately, we can't email you.

Peter the German & Jenny the Kiwi, who intend to follow in your tracks a year later.

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Salut from Southern France, the bikers' paradise,

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  #10  
Old 22 Dec 2003
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Hey Peter, we're in the Cevennes, about an hour north west of Nimes...

We're doing a bit of work on an old house in exchange for accommodation before heading off in late Feb...

Perhaps we can catch up sometime before we go.

Cheers
Jacqui
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Old 22 Dec 2003
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Hi Jacqui,

We're about 400km from you and love to catch up before you leave again.

I just realised you couldn't email us, our address being hidden - duuuhh

Should be fixed now, so please send an email so we can get in touch.

Cheers,

Peter.
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  #12  
Old 21 Jan 2004
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Hi, me and the better third ( well she is a lot smaller than me) have done 2 longish trips, 18 months to Ozz and 11 months to SA and we get on better when we are away that when at home, and we get on very well at home. We have fairly well defined roles when traveling, I do all the riding, repairing, route planning, sorting currency and all paperwork, border formalities etc, Gill does the tent stuff and cooking and is in charge of packing the bike, I do the heavy donkey work but she decides where stuff goes, might sound a little chauvanistic but it works very well for us. Regards Chris
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  #13  
Old 21 Jan 2004
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My wife and I get on better when we're touring. This is probably due to me being unbearable at home. I hate mundanity and am always planning the next escapade whilst on tour I'm too busy dealing with the current situation.

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  #14  
Old 10 Feb 2004
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[ We have fairly well defined roles when traveling, I do all the riding, repairing, route planning, sorting currency and all paperwork, border formalities etc, Gill does the tent stuff and cooking and is in charge of packing the bike, I do the heavy donkey work but she decides where stuff goes, might sound a little chauvanistic but it works very well for us. Regards Chris[/B][/QUOTE]

We have many travellers thru our "Humble Abode" and it seems to me that most of the happiest couples are the ones who have defined roles. I guess it's a case of doing what you do do well.

Regards

Nigel in NZ

--"How can I be lost if I don't care where I am?"--


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  #15  
Old 18 Oct 2008
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Bad luck Paochui. I suppose you'll now have to do what you want, how you want, when you want.
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